Leicester Square

11 Dec 2013 - The 'Anchorman 2' Premiere

December 11th, 2013.

And so for the last time this year I'm at Leicester Square for a premiere, and this one is rather unusual : I haven't photographed a SINGLE person from this film before, and not because it's some strange Uzbekhi Action Sci-Fi Romance, either! (Slight correction : I realise now I once actually photographed Will Ferrell side-on outside a radio station. He was wearing sunglasses. True story.)

So with relatively high stakes to go with relatively low temperatures, here's how it went down:


It's a giant TV Screen! And a premiere! And I don't even care that I didn't really think the first one was quite as good as everybody kept raving - I saw it last year well after the hype-period had passed.

It's a giant TV Screen! And a premiere! And I don't even care that I didn't really think the first one was quite as good as everybody kept raving - I saw it last year well after the hype-period had passed.

Why is it that impossibly pretty ladies who are having trouble with their DSLRs that I might be able to help them with are always based in other cities... or standing behind impenetrable low metal barriers?  Bah... the universe hates me.

Why is it that impossibly pretty ladies who are having trouble with their DSLRs that I might be able to help them with are always based in other cities... or standing behind impenetrable low metal barriers? Bah... the universe hates me.

Our first arrival had nothing to do with the film, but James Corden is pretty cool. Meanwhile : shock revelation : my Pentax's battery had about 10 shots in it as I hadn't changed battery since the prior premiere or the one before that. What about the spare? I hear you ask. Umm... it's been so long since it had been recharged that it had fully discharged in the meantime. What about the SPARE spare? I hear you ask. Apparently also down to about 10-15 shots. Farq. I used to be so cool. Don't look at me, pretty DSLR lady...

Our first arrival had nothing to do with the film, but James Corden is pretty cool. Meanwhile : shock revelation : my Pentax's battery had about 10 shots in it as I hadn't changed battery since the prior premiere or the one before that. What about the spare? I hear you ask. Umm... it's been so long since it had been recharged that it had fully discharged in the meantime. What about the SPARE spare? I hear you ask. Apparently also down to about 10-15 shots. Farq. I used to be so cool. Don't look at me, pretty DSLR lady...

"If I could distract you all from the mayhem on the screen behind you and the pretty ladies struggling with their DSLRs wishing a knowledgeable guy could help them for a moment, my name is Alex Zane and I'll be your host tonight. That is all. You may keep watching the trailer and listening to songs from the soundtrack for another 45minutes"  Well.. it passed the time.

"If I could distract you all from the mayhem on the screen behind you and the pretty ladies struggling with their DSLRs wishing a knowledgeable guy could help them for a moment, my name is Alex Zane and I'll be your host tonight. That is all. You may keep watching the trailer and listening to songs from the soundtrack for another 45minutes" Well.. it passed the time.

Random arrival : former England Football captain Gary Linnecker. Or, as the lady behind me explained "He's that guy from that grocery commercial". Harvey Dent was right : you either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.

Random arrival : former England Football captain Gary Linnecker. Or, as the lady behind me explained "He's that guy from that grocery commercial". Harvey Dent was right : you either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.

Christina Applegate was in 258 episodes of "Married With Children" from 1987 to 1997, but also 42 episodes of something called "Jesse", 35 episodes of something called "Samantha Who?" and yet another 35 episodes of something called "Up All Night". Plus two episodes of 'Friends'. Giving her a box set of Friends DVDs to sign probably improves her day no end.

Christina Applegate was in 258 episodes of "Married With Children" from 1987 to 1997, but also 42 episodes of something called "Jesse", 35 episodes of something called "Samantha Who?" and yet another 35 episodes of something called "Up All Night". Plus two episodes of 'Friends'. Giving her a box set of Friends DVDs to sign probably improves her day no end.

"Her holiday photos are still loading so I'm happy to wave for now"

"Her holiday photos are still loading so I'm happy to wave for now"

"What's it like being a woman? Are you sure you've read the whole question on that piece of paper you're holding? If so, then let's talk about wearing thin dresses at events like this while you guys are wearing layers upon layers"  It was about 4 or 5 degrees celsius. I was wearing layers upon layers.

"What's it like being a woman? Are you sure you've read the whole question on that piece of paper you're holding? If so, then let's talk about wearing thin dresses at events like this while you guys are wearing layers upon layers" It was about 4 or 5 degrees celsius. I was wearing layers upon layers.

That said, check out the lacework on this dress. Only David Koechler's shirt and tie match it for amazingness, and his wasn't done by genius silkworms working from schematics out of Swiss watchmakers' diagrams. My beanie is generic black thinsulate material.

That said, check out the lacework on this dress. Only David Koechler's shirt and tie match it for amazingness, and his wasn't done by genius silkworms working from schematics out of Swiss watchmakers' diagrams. My beanie is generic black thinsulate material.

"We don't want you to sign anything, just endorse our youtube channels!!"  Pretty much everyone seems to be shooting videos these days. Except for the person holding the SLR - they're shooting with the onboard flash, so good luck with that if you're trying to photograph Steve Carrell who is about twenty meters away with his back turned.

"We don't want you to sign anything, just endorse our youtube channels!!" Pretty much everyone seems to be shooting videos these days. Except for the person holding the SLR - they're shooting with the onboard flash, so good luck with that if you're trying to photograph Steve Carrell who is about twenty meters away with his back turned.

David Koechner hits our pen and signs autographs or marks exam papers or witnesses legal documents or plays fruit ninja on somebody's mobile phone. I can't see from where I'm standing but I'm sure it's something socially acceptable.

David Koechner hits our pen and signs autographs or marks exam papers or witnesses legal documents or plays fruit ninja on somebody's mobile phone. I can't see from where I'm standing but I'm sure it's something socially acceptable.

" You're telling me it's cold? Believe me, I KNOW IT'S FRIKKIN COLD"  yeah.. probably about 5 degrees. I was wearing layers. Meagan Good is in this film, and was also in the Early Joseph-Gordon-Levitt film 'Brick' which was actually quite good for a noir/school/detective story.

"You're telling me it's cold? Believe me, I KNOW IT'S FRIKKIN COLD" yeah.. probably about 5 degrees. I was wearing layers. Meagan Good is in this film, and was also in the Early Joseph-Gordon-Levitt film 'Brick' which was actually quite good for a noir/school/detective story.

"I'm not saying Will Ferrell doesn't have a great singing voice, I'm just saying I can hit those Mariah Carey HIGH notes and he -usually- can't"

"I'm not saying Will Ferrell doesn't have a great singing voice, I'm just saying I can hit those Mariah Carey HIGH notes and he -usually- can't"

I was all set to say I have no idea who James Marsden is, but he was Cyclops in the Bryan Singer XMen movies, and also had a small role in "Robot & Frank", a movie I quite liked. That's all I've got - he walked past and waved. I couldn't tell if he had any *actual* mutant powers or anything.

I was all set to say I have no idea who James Marsden is, but he was Cyclops in the Bryan Singer XMen movies, and also had a small role in "Robot & Frank", a movie I quite liked. That's all I've got - he walked past and waved. I couldn't tell if he had any *actual* mutant powers or anything.

"Your hat with the ears has charm, but the guy with the Santa hat REALLY put in some effort, so I'm not signing that. You can have a high-five though?"  Judd Apatow has arrived.

"Your hat with the ears has charm, but the guy with the Santa hat REALLY put in some effort, so I'm not signing that. You can have a high-five though?" Judd Apatow has arrived.

Judd Apatow is one of six producers of this film, and a director in his own right, having also directed The 40year Old Virgin, This is 40, and Knocked Up. He was also 'Barry the Elephant' in Zookeper (2011).

Judd Apatow is one of six producers of this film, and a director in his own right, having also directed The 40year Old Virgin, This is 40, and Knocked Up. He was also 'Barry the Elephant' in Zookeper (2011).

"We love making these movies and we're going to keep making them. Consider this our promise to you our fans, or our threat to you and your family. Quiver or Rejoice, people!!"  Adam McKay directed the prior Anchorman, and also Stepbrothers and The Other Guys, both of which starred Will Ferrell. Outside money says he may actually BE Will Ferrell.

"We love making these movies and we're going to keep making them. Consider this our promise to you our fans, or our threat to you and your family. Quiver or Rejoice, people!!" Adam McKay directed the prior Anchorman, and also Stepbrothers and The Other Guys, both of which starred Will Ferrell. Outside money says he may actually BE Will Ferrell.

"OMG this is the greatest Twilight Fanfic EVER!! Too bad its like totally over and forgotten, I guess.... but email it to me!"  Paul Rudd is best known (perhaps) for comedies, but I do want to give him credit for his role in 'The Perks of Being A Wallflower', which despite (or perhaps because of) not being at all in the demographic target market for I really like. As for Twilight... that's different. Just because I read the books doesn't mean I liked them.

"OMG this is the greatest Twilight Fanfic EVER!! Too bad its like totally over and forgotten, I guess.... but email it to me!" Paul Rudd is best known (perhaps) for comedies, but I do want to give him credit for his role in 'The Perks of Being A Wallflower', which despite (or perhaps because of) not being at all in the demographic target market for I really like. As for Twilight... that's different. Just because I read the books doesn't mean I liked them.

"Seriously, email me. In fact, here's my home address : mail it to me. If you can't get me, here's my agent's address, and this is Will Ferrells. He does't like Twilight and it'll piss him off so send it to him too"

"Seriously, email me. In fact, here's my home address : mail it to me. If you can't get me, here's my agent's address, and this is Will Ferrells. He does't like Twilight and it'll piss him off so send it to him too"

"I just want to stop you for a moment, Alex. I think Paul Rudd just stole that guy's wallet. It's exactly the kind of thing he'll try. Except for legal reasons, I didn't just say that so let's keep talking about the movie"

"I just want to stop you for a moment, Alex. I think Paul Rudd just stole that guy's wallet. It's exactly the kind of thing he'll try. Except for legal reasons, I didn't just say that so let's keep talking about the movie"

"Four hundred dollars for the shirt and tie. Right now. It's hypnotic and I can't stand looking at it and now owning it"

"Four hundred dollars for the shirt and tie. Right now. It's hypnotic and I can't stand looking at it and now owning it"

"Male baldness is sexy, ladies. I SAID SEXY!! And now I'm saying it again, more reasonable-like"  David Koechner's argument is cogent, convincing and in English.

"Male baldness is sexy, ladies. I SAID SEXY!! And now I'm saying it again, more reasonable-like" David Koechner's argument is cogent, convincing and in English.

Steve Carell is pretty excellent. That is all.

Steve Carell is pretty excellent. That is all.

"You want me to sign it with my left hand because Steve Carrell signed it with his right and.... okay, alternatively why don't I just deputise you to sign it on my behalf?"

"You want me to sign it with my left hand because Steve Carrell signed it with his right and.... okay, alternatively why don't I just deputise you to sign it on my behalf?"

"OMG IT'S ME!!!!!"  I want to start the rumour that Steve Carrell chatted to autograph dealers, found out how much his autograph was worth, and signed a few pictures out to himself and offered them for sale to fans.

"OMG IT'S ME!!!!!" I want to start the rumour that Steve Carrell chatted to autograph dealers, found out how much his autograph was worth, and signed a few pictures out to himself and offered them for sale to fans.

"The optimum number of spoons of milo for a large cup? I say six, Alex. Stir once you've added an inch of boiling water, and keep stirring as you add more. Are we going to talk about the movie at all? Because we don't have to, you know"

"The optimum number of spoons of milo for a large cup? I say six, Alex. Stir once you've added an inch of boiling water, and keep stirring as you add more. Are we going to talk about the movie at all? Because we don't have to, you know"

"I'm not usually asked to comment on Nobel Laureates, but I had good money on Higgs, and he won along with Englert, so that was good. It'll keep the debt collectors at bay for a few more weeks. Stop betting on horses and bet on science instead, people"

"I'm not usually asked to comment on Nobel Laureates, but I had good money on Higgs, and he won along with Englert, so that was good. It'll keep the debt collectors at bay for a few more weeks. Stop betting on horses and bet on science instead, people"

"There are poor people over there and they want me to give them money? Well how can I avoid having to do that?"

"There are poor people over there and they want me to give them money? Well how can I avoid having to do that?"

"That man over there is going to see a Disney film and he's not taking any kids. He must be stopped, Alex"  I've heard great things about Disney's "Frozen" but I haven't seen it yet.

"That man over there is going to see a Disney film and he's not taking any kids. He must be stopped, Alex" I've heard great things about Disney's "Frozen" but I haven't seen it yet.

"We got him to watch 'Gravity' instead. He'll thank us later, it's a wonderful film " It is pretty excellent, actually.

"We got him to watch 'Gravity' instead. He'll thank us later, it's a wonderful film" It is pretty excellent, actually.

Must..... kill.... the.... Micronesian.... Prime Mandrake..... (next time I hear Frankie Goes To Hollywood)  (Must watch Zoolander again)

Must..... kill.... the.... Micronesian.... Prime Mandrake..... (next time I hear Frankie Goes To Hollywood) (Must watch Zoolander again)

So... that was a fun way to round out the year. Time to head home, heat up some leftovers and... wait... honestly? Phone call with the USA on the Infrastructure-As-A-Service Cloud Market Price Model? My life is so rock'n'roll. But call me if you need with you DSLRs, ladies.. (that might have come out creepier than I wanted to, but it's the redbubble default font)

Until next time, when hopefully in 2014 I can add more items into the ever-growing "Archive of Movie Premieres"

The last couple of large ones included:
Mandela - The Long Walk to Freedom Royal Premiere - Elba! Harris! Kate and William!
Hunger Games Catching Fire - Lawrence! Hemsworth! Hutcherson! Banks! Sutherland!
Thor - The Dark World - Hemsworth! Hiddleston! Portman! Whedon! Dennings!
Twelve Years A Slave - McQueen! Ejiofor!

Until Next Year!


And if you ever want to know when I post one of these journals, feel free to follow me on twitter @berndt2_photo, or on facebook at premieresdotco.

 

4 Dec 2013 - 'The Railway Man' Premiere

December 4th, 2013.

Some four years ago I took a photo of Nicole Kidman at the premiere of "Australia" which I even had published. Then, earlier this year at the premiere of Stoker I unsuccessfully attempted to get it signed. Hence, with a new movie out, I grabbed my cameras, equipment AND the photo off to Leicester Square to have another go. She didn't attend.

Still. here's how it went down:

The Odeon West End hosts its second premiere in four days. It's for 'The Railway Man', but if my rancid train company is sponsoring this event, I am walking away. Interesting fact : First Capital Connect has a self-imposed service level that says they'll attempt to respond to emails within 5 days. The most recent reply I got took a month. There's another one that I've still a fortnight from receiving a response for. The point being : I believe this is a vengeance flick?

The Odeon West End hosts its second premiere in four days. It's for 'The Railway Man', but if my rancid train company is sponsoring this event, I am walking away. Interesting fact : First Capital Connect has a self-imposed service level that says they'll attempt to respond to emails within 5 days. The most recent reply I got took a month. There's another one that I've still a fortnight from receiving a response for. The point being : I believe this is a vengeance flick?

I have been reliably informed that this is Myleene Klass but I'm not entirely certain who she is or why she is famous. Yes, I've seen her in that ad for a supermarket's Christmas offering, but I'm not sure that alone constitutes 'fame'.

I have been reliably informed that this is Myleene Klass but I'm not entirely certain who she is or why she is famous. Yes, I've seen her in that ad for a supermarket's Christmas offering, but I'm not sure that alone constitutes 'fame'.

A photograph of the "Tip List" confirms that the rumours are true : Nicole Kidman is not expected to attend tonight. I try to retain hope that she's so well-known that she doesn't NEED to be on the list, but that's kind of a vain hope.

A photograph of the "Tip List" confirms that the rumours are true : Nicole Kidman is not expected to attend tonight. I try to retain hope that she's so well-known that she doesn't NEED to be on the list, but that's kind of a vain hope.

"That microphone had better be on, Jeff. I'm not doing this twice"  Hours pass and the temperature falls to a balmy five or six degrees (which isn't cold, but is if you're standing out in it for a few hours). Anyway, this woman presumably wants to get this Intro right in one take so she get into a less glamorous but warmer jacket.

"That microphone had better be on, Jeff. I'm not doing this twice"
Hours pass and the temperature falls to a balmy five or six degrees (which isn't cold, but is if you're standing out in it for a few hours). Anyway, this woman presumably wants to get this Intro right in one take so she get into a less glamorous but warmer jacket.

"Sonny, in my day our digital SLRs were called 'sketchpads' "  More guests arrive. And they are wearing ties. Repeat : ties.

"Sonny, in my day our digital SLRs were called 'sketchpads' " More guests arrive. And they are wearing ties. Repeat : ties.

Jeremy Irvine was the original (?) owner of the horse in  "War Horse"  and I keep thinking he was the voice of Tintin in Tintin, but that's Jamie Bell.

Jeremy Irvine was the original (?) owner of the horse in "War Horse" and I keep thinking he was the voice of Tintin in Tintin, but that's Jamie Bell.

Jeremy Irvine still owes me five dollars, or so I like to claim. Seems he wants to negotiate it down to two dollars. In this economic environment? I don't think so.

Jeremy Irvine still owes me five dollars, or so I like to claim. Seems he wants to negotiate it down to two dollars. In this economic environment? I don't think so.

Sam Reid doesn't look familiar, though he was in the  Roland Emmerich Shakespeare-Conspiracy movie "Anonymous" . He plays Young Stellan Skarsgard in this film.

Sam Reid doesn't look familiar, though he was in the Roland Emmerich Shakespeare-Conspiracy movie "Anonymous". He plays Young Stellan Skarsgard in this film.

Has just been informed that the 20:04 train to Bedford is currently running late, and the pre-recorded voice message telling him this assures him that somebody, somewhere, was once paid to say they're sorry for the inconvenience caused. And it almost certainly wasn't somebody who worked for First Capital Connect or gives a crap.

Has just been informed that the 20:04 train to Bedford is currently running late, and the pre-recorded voice message telling him this assures him that somebody, somewhere, was once paid to say they're sorry for the inconvenience caused. And it almost certainly wasn't somebody who worked for First Capital Connect or gives a crap.

Jonathan Teplitzky shows up looking like the younger Picard Clone that Star Trek Insurrection really could have used. He's the director of this film, and the lady to his left is the widow of the man who wrote the autobiographical book upon which the film is based.

Jonathan Teplitzky shows up looking like the younger Picard Clone that Star Trek Insurrection really could have used. He's the director of this film, and the lady to his left is the widow of the man who wrote the autobiographical book upon which the film is based.

"You hated Star Trek Insurrection? Me too!! I wasn't in it, though. Tom Hardy was"  In all honesty, the things that were waaaaay wrong about Star Trek Insurrection had little to do with Tom Hardy specifically.

"You hated Star Trek Insurrection? Me too!! I wasn't in it, though. Tom Hardy was" In all honesty, the things that were waaaaay wrong about Star Trek Insurrection had little to do with Tom Hardy specifically.

Tanroh Ishida is set to be in the upcoming Keanu Reeves appalling-CGI-fest "47 Ronin" and was  in "Gambit" with Colin Firth  as well. I try to explain to him how appalling First Capital Connect are, but he's (London-based) Japanese and comes from a country whose trains are so punctual you could schedule brain surgery based on timetable accuracy. (In England, FCC are owned by an American company...)

Tanroh Ishida is set to be in the upcoming Keanu Reeves appalling-CGI-fest "47 Ronin" and was in "Gambit" with Colin Firth as well. I try to explain to him how appalling First Capital Connect are, but he's (London-based) Japanese and comes from a country whose trains are so punctual you could schedule brain surgery based on timetable accuracy. (In England, FCC are owned by an American company...)

Right... there's a premiere on.

"You're absolutely right... watching this movie illegally streaming is a lot faster than having to go inside and watch a whole bunch of trailers"  Also illegal. Movie piracy is killing jobs, people - and even though the bastards who made movies like The Smurfs2, After Earth, The Lone Ranger, Die Hard 5 and to a lesser extent Man of Steel ABSOLUTELY deserve to lose their jobs, some of the catering staff don't. It's a complicated moral issue, sure.

"You're absolutely right... watching this movie illegally streaming is a lot faster than having to go inside and watch a whole bunch of trailers" Also illegal. Movie piracy is killing jobs, people - and even though the bastards who made movies like The Smurfs2, After Earth, The Lone Ranger, Die Hard 5 and to a lesser extent Man of Steel ABSOLUTELY deserve to lose their jobs, some of the catering staff don't. It's a complicated moral issue, sure.

Colin Firth has arrived, looking temporarily haggard. Maybe he's been helping First Capital Connect work on their backlog of customer service complaint responses, which I'm assured is the reason why it's taking them up to 4x longer to respond disinterestedly with copy-paste proforma responses than usual.

Colin Firth has arrived, looking temporarily haggard. Maybe he's been helping First Capital Connect work on their backlog of customer service complaint responses, which I'm assured is the reason why it's taking them up to 4x longer to respond disinterestedly with copy-paste proforma responses than usual.

"I know this is totally unprofessional of me, but could you please adjust the white balance and exposure compensation on my camera so I can take a better photo of you?"

"I know this is totally unprofessional of me, but could you please adjust the white balance and exposure compensation on my camera so I can take a better photo of you?"

"Best hairstyle of my generation? That's kind of you to say, but I know One Direction were here just a few days ago"  Jeremy Irvine signs for fans.... or completes their cryptic crosswords. I can't see from here.

"Best hairstyle of my generation? That's kind of you to say, but I know One Direction were here just a few days ago" Jeremy Irvine signs for fans.... or completes their cryptic crosswords. I can't see from here.

"Damn these Delay Repay forms are annoying to fill out".  Yeah, and the refunds can only be used to pay for more train tickets. Which is like almost dying from a bad batch of cocaine but having the Dealer give yo a credit on your next purchase, produced in the same lab conditions by the same people as almost killed you last time. (I said *ALMOST like*)

"Damn these Delay Repay forms are annoying to fill out". Yeah, and the refunds can only be used to pay for more train tickets. Which is like almost dying from a bad batch of cocaine but having the Dealer give yo a credit on your next purchase, produced in the same lab conditions by the same people as almost killed you last time. (I said *ALMOST like*)

"You carried that Nicole Kidman 18x12 photo all this way only for her not to be here? I am apalled, and would be happy to sign it on her behalf"  Thanks, Colin Firth, but that's okay.

"You carried that Nicole Kidman 18x12 photo all this way only for her not to be here? I am apalled, and would be happy to sign it on her behalf" Thanks, Colin Firth, but that's okay.

"Colin was a joy to work with. And don't touch my lapel - Stellan Skarsgard brushed past it once and I swore I'd never wash it"  Stellan Skarsgard sadly didn't attend tonight either, but I photographed him about a month ago at  the premiere of "Thor the Dark World"

"Colin was a joy to work with. And don't touch my lapel - Stellan Skarsgard brushed past it once and I swore I'd never wash it" Stellan Skarsgard sadly didn't attend tonight either, but I photographed him about a month ago at the premiere of "Thor the Dark World"

"Yes, I would say that the trains in this country are appalling. However, I can't understand why people don't just buy a Bentley and get a driver to take them everywhere - isn't that the obvious solution?"  Gosh darn it, he's right.

"Yes, I would say that the trains in this country are appalling. However, I can't understand why people don't just buy a Bentley and get a driver to take them everywhere - isn't that the obvious solution?" Gosh darn it, he's right.

Colin Firth gets within just a few meters, and stares enigmatically into the middle distance, pondering imponderables. Because if a machine can learn the value of a human life, maybe we can too?

Colin Firth gets within just a few meters, and stares enigmatically into the middle distance, pondering imponderables. Because if a machine can learn the value of a human life, maybe we can too?

Given he played The King in "The King's Speech" I'm rather pleased I got a good-quality profile shot. This is totally what the back of the coins minted during his reign would have looked like.

Given he played The King in "The King's Speech" I'm rather pleased I got a good-quality profile shot. This is totally what the back of the coins minted during his reign would have looked like.

"I'm pretty sure I'd rather be riding the ferris wheel in the Christmas festival in Leicester Square than fighting the queue for popcorn. I'll wait for you there"

"I'm pretty sure I'd rather be riding the ferris wheel in the Christmas festival in Leicester Square than fighting the queue for popcorn. I'll wait for you there"

"Hey, you're right. I *AM* looking good - thanks for noticing!!"

"Hey, you're right. I *AM* looking good - thanks for noticing!!"

So.. .that's another one. And tomorrow, I'll hopefully be doing one again.

Until next time!

Here's The Archive of Movie Premieres

PS. If you ever want to know when I post one of these journals, feel free to follow me on twitter @berndt2_photo, or on facebook at premieresdotco.

1 Dec 2013 - 'The Class of 92' Premiere

December 1st, 2013.

Being from Australia; and having an iPod that is probably about half-full of soundtrack scores, and much of the remainder comprised of weird stuff I picked up on my travels..... it might seem strange that I would head in to London for the premiere of a Documentary about Manchester United, set to be attended by several of the band OneDirection.

Genuinely, I'm not sure why either. My knowledge of Manchester United's 'Class of 92' was limited to verifying that David Beckham was one of them, and I can recognise him due to his magnificent hair. Meanwhile my knowledge of OneDirection is limited to the screaming of teen girls and the name Harry Styles, once again primarily due to his magnificent hair. (Needless to say, that's more than enough reason to head down to Leicester Square on a Sunday evening).

So, with sincere apologies to any fans of either Manchester United or One Direction, neither of whom are well served by my lack of knowledge in their areas of superior performance, here's how I felt it went down*

I'm in Leicester Square, the carpet hasn't been laid, there's a Christmas carnival behind me and the average age of the crowd is skewed surprisingly young for a documentary about footballers in 1992, a year many of these people would not have been born....

I'm in Leicester Square, the carpet hasn't been laid, there's a Christmas carnival behind me and the average age of the crowd is skewed surprisingly young for a documentary about footballers in 1992, a year many of these people would not have been born....

First to arrive : Phil Neville. The lady to my left is trembling slightly because she's from Manchester and knows who he is. The two Australian girls behind me are here for OneDirection and don't seem to be similarly affected.

First to arrive : Phil Neville. The lady to my left is trembling slightly because she's from Manchester and knows who he is. The two Australian girls behind me are here for OneDirection and don't seem to be similarly affected.

Fine, I've gone onto wikipedia to learn Phil Neville not only played for Manchester United, but has been confirmed as their new first team coach. And his brother also played for Manchester United, and his twin sister was an England netball international. Impressive!

Fine, I've gone onto wikipedia to learn Phil Neville not only played for Manchester United, but has been confirmed as their new first team coach. And his brother also played for Manchester United, and his twin sister was an England netball international. Impressive!

OneDirection has a bald bandmember already? Cool (?) - but why no screaming from the girls all around me?

OneDirection has a bald bandmember already? Cool (?) - but why no screaming from the girls all around me?

Nicky Butt is apparently not a OneDirection bandmember, but instead is a former Manchester United player and currently reserve team coach for the team.

Nicky Butt is apparently not a OneDirection bandmember, but instead is a former Manchester United player and currently reserve team coach for the team.

Oh, look. It's somebody else I'm going to have to go to wireimage to identify, and then decide whether to head on to wikipedia to get the lowdown on. I honestly don't think I have time for both, so I'll just leave it at Tony Adams. Not from One Direction, as I would have been stampeded by now and not able to take this photograph. (He played for Arsenal. Thanks, wikipedia!)

Oh, look. It's somebody else I'm going to have to go to wireimage to identify, and then decide whether to head on to wikipedia to get the lowdown on. I honestly don't think I have time for both, so I'll just leave it at Tony Adams. Not from One Direction, as I would have been stampeded by now and not able to take this photograph. (He played for Arsenal. Thanks, wikipedia!)

I was going to say that it was sweet of the OneDirection bandmember to bring his Dad/Uncle to the premiere. Turns out it's the guy in front who is famous : he's Paul Scholes, and that's his son. Paul Scholes played for ManU from 1993-2013, retiring for the second time this year.  Wow. I'm roughly his age and haven't even retired once, yet.

I was going to say that it was sweet of the OneDirection bandmember to bring his Dad/Uncle to the premiere. Turns out it's the guy in front who is famous : he's Paul Scholes, and that's his son. Paul Scholes played for ManU from 1993-2013, retiring for the second time this year. Wow. I'm roughly his age and haven't even retired once, yet.

" Don't feel bad you don't know who I am, ladies. I'm a fan of 1D too"  Well played, Paul Scholes.

"Don't feel bad you don't know who I am, ladies. I'm a fan of 1D too" Well played, Paul Scholes.

Don't let the demure expression fool you. She's probably got two carving knives ready to dismember anyone who gets between her and Harry or Zane if either turn up (... sorry, that's all the names of One Direction bandmembers I've been able to absorb from the teen girls surrounding me).

Don't let the demure expression fool you. She's probably got two carving knives ready to dismember anyone who gets between her and Harry or Zane if either turn up (... sorry, that's all the names of One Direction bandmembers I've been able to absorb from the teen girls surrounding me).

It's David Beckham! Please allow me to one day let you buy me a drink so I can tell you how the battery on my old Pentax K10D ran out while taking a rapid-shot burst IN THE MIDDLE of a free kick he took for LA Galaxy against Sydney FC at Sydney Olympic stadium. The last photo I took was of the ball clearing the wall of defenders... then the battery gave out. Needless to say Beckham nailed that goal, and I missed it. I'll be having that drink now. Again.

It's David Beckham! Please allow me to one day let you buy me a drink so I can tell you how the battery on my old Pentax K10D ran out while taking a rapid-shot burst IN THE MIDDLE of a free kick he took for LA Galaxy against Sydney FC at Sydney Olympic stadium. The last photo I took was of the ball clearing the wall of defenders... then the battery gave out. Needless to say Beckham nailed that goal, and I missed it. I'll be having that drink now. Again.

" Guys, I can't sign for long. I've got lots of interviews, plus my daughter has said she'll never speak to me again if I don't get Harry Styles' autograph and his commitment to marry her or something"  I believe this Gary Neville, brother of Phil (above) and Tracey (referenced above). I'm not sure if he has kids, but he has played for Manchester United.

"Guys, I can't sign for long. I've got lots of interviews, plus my daughter has said she'll never speak to me again if I don't get Harry Styles' autograph and his commitment to marry her or something" I believe this Gary Neville, brother of Phil (above) and Tracey (referenced above). I'm not sure if he has kids, but he has played for Manchester United.

Ladies, please commence your screaming, crying, fainting or whatever. This is Harry Styles, and he is from One Direction. My heart rate hasn't increased any, but taken as an average for the people in my pen, yeah, both average heart rate and pheromone levels have jumped somewhat.

Ladies, please commence your screaming, crying, fainting or whatever. This is Harry Styles, and he is from One Direction. My heart rate hasn't increased any, but taken as an average for the people in my pen, yeah, both average heart rate and pheromone levels have jumped somewhat.

His hair, as prophecied, is magnificent, and probably obscures noise-cancelling in-ear headphones he's wearing for protection.

His hair, as prophecied, is magnificent, and probably obscures noise-cancelling in-ear headphones he's wearing for protection.

I get the screaming girls, but that excited Dude all-but crowdsurfing over the two rows in front is a Dude, right? Fine... I'll have to check out OneDirection on itunes. They've obviously caught on.

I get the screaming girls, but that excited Dude all-but crowdsurfing over the two rows in front is a Dude, right? Fine... I'll have to check out OneDirection on itunes. They've obviously caught on.

"MARRY MEEEEEE!!!!"   I still can't believe they've combined the fandom of Manchester United with the - surely- entirely separate demographic of One Direction fans. Surely that's like inviting both great white sharks and pihrana to the same banquet and expecting everybody to leave with teeth, limbs and hearing intact.

"MARRY MEEEEEE!!!!" I still can't believe they've combined the fandom of Manchester United with the - surely- entirely separate demographic of One Direction fans. Surely that's like inviting both great white sharks and pihrana to the same banquet and expecting everybody to leave with teeth, limbs and hearing intact.

I kind of wish this photo was more in focus, but to take it I'd have to have entered the "danger/deafness" zone, and braved violent estrogen levels the likes of which even the Spartans in 300 might back away at. Still... if you really want your hairdresser to give you the same style as Styles, feel free to show them this photo.

I kind of wish this photo was more in focus, but to take it I'd have to have entered the "danger/deafness" zone, and braved violent estrogen levels the likes of which even the Spartans in 300 might back away at. Still... if you really want your hairdresser to give you the same style as Styles, feel free to show them this photo.

"Hold on a second, I think I owe that Australian guy over there five thousand dollars" I'm sure it was five million.

"Hold on a second, I think I owe that Australian guy over there five thousand dollars" I'm sure it was five million.

Just in case you thought it was safe to stop crying and shaking uncontrollably, here's another One Direction bandmember. I believe his name is Liam. (Girls in our area were still shouting out for Harry, so it was hard to tell).

Just in case you thought it was safe to stop crying and shaking uncontrollably, here's another One Direction bandmember. I believe his name is Liam. (Girls in our area were still shouting out for Harry, so it was hard to tell).

"Babe, I can sign anything you put in front of me, but if it's a stamp for an envelope the security guy behind me will be happy to lick it for you"

"Babe, I can sign anything you put in front of me, but if it's a stamp for an envelope the security guy behind me will be happy to lick it for you"

"Now let's see if 256 games for Manchester United get me discount popcorn in this cinema"

"Now let's see if 256 games for Manchester United get me discount popcorn in this cinema"

" You realise I'm not medically trained to be able to sign that declaration you're putting in front of me? Oh, you don't care. Well that makes all the difference"  Ryan Giggs isn't sure.

"You realise I'm not medically trained to be able to sign that declaration you're putting in front of me? Oh, you don't care. Well that makes all the difference" Ryan Giggs isn't sure.

"You realise I'm not....? Oh, you don't care. Very well, then"  Ryan Giggs acquiesces.

"You realise I'm not....? Oh, you don't care. Very well, then" Ryan Giggs acquiesces.

To the best of my limited football knowledge, this is Gordon Ramsay. Who is a chef.

To the best of my limited football knowledge, this is Gordon Ramsay. Who is a chef.

If I was any kind of football fan I guess I might have asked for an autograph, high five, hairgel advice or the number of a good tattooist. Instead : a slightly overcropped shot of David Beckham. (You're welcome!!)

If I was any kind of football fan I guess I might have asked for an autograph, high five, hairgel advice or the number of a good tattooist. Instead : a slightly overcropped shot of David Beckham. (You're welcome!!)

Posh, Becks and Offspring of various sizes. With big thanks to the person holding up the camera in front of me. Not because they have no right to (they do), but because I believe their picture isn't in focus and they probably ARE going to need a flash in that light and at that distance. Mrs Beckham, as a designer / model / performer, has an expression that's on my side, clearly.

Posh, Becks and Offspring of various sizes. With big thanks to the person holding up the camera in front of me. Not because they have no right to (they do), but because I believe their picture isn't in focus and they probably ARE going to need a flash in that light and at that distance. Mrs Beckham, as a designer / model / performer, has an expression that's on my side, clearly.

Well... that pose doesn't look in the least sexy.

Well... that pose doesn't look in the least sexy.

And now that I've photographed Hunchback Spice, I can with some proud indifference state I've now photographed all the Spice Girls - Baby and Sporty Spices at the "Pride of Britain Awards last year" , Scary Spice at the first "Hunger Games premiere" and Ginger Spice at "The Boat that Rocked". Next up : Bandmembers of Def Leppard!?

And now that I've photographed Hunchback Spice, I can with some proud indifference state I've now photographed all the Spice Girls - Baby and Sporty Spices at the "Pride of Britain Awards last year" , Scary Spice at the first "Hunger Games premiere" and Ginger Spice at "The Boat that Rocked". Next up : Bandmembers of Def Leppard!?

And a shot of all six of the Class of 92. Did I really bring a Monopod to a premiere because I suspected I'd have trouble getting height in this crowd? Yes, yes I did.

And a shot of all six of the Class of 92. Did I really bring a Monopod to a premiere because I suspected I'd have trouble getting height in this crowd? Yes, yes I did.

So.... after that, I faced the long trek back home, wondering if my hearing would ever return, and trying to figure out what documentary the bandmembers of Def Leppard would likely get invited to attend...

Until next time, it's another for "The Archive of Movie Premieres"

Incidentally, if you ever want to know when I post one of these journals, feel free to follow me on twitter @berndt2_photo, or on facebook at premieresdotco.

11 Nov 2013 - 'The Hunger Games : Catching Fire' Premiere

November 11th, 2013.

Ah, The Hunger Games. Finally a post-Twilight franchise with a female lead I can actually support and enjoy the exploits of. I've read and liked the books, watched the prior movie, and even went to the rather raucous out-of-town premiere for the first film a few years back. But this time around, the premiere was a World Premiere, right in the heart of London. And it rained.

Here's how it went down.

I was able to limit my total queueing time to a mere 5 hours and score a view of the Odeon Leicester Square. Or, if I turned around, a view of the stage that hopefully most of the cast would be interviewed on. It's a Monday now, but there were rumours of people camping since last Thursday for spots, and the queue was apparently at 174 twenty four hours before the premiere's scheduled start time.

I was able to limit my total queueing time to a mere 5 hours and score a view of the Odeon Leicester Square. Or, if I turned around, a view of the stage that hopefully most of the cast would be interviewed on. It's a Monday now, but there were rumours of people camping since last Thursday for spots, and the queue was apparently at 174 twenty four hours before the premiere's scheduled start time.

Willow Shields plays Katniss' rather useless younger sister Primrose in the film. Her dress was yellow, but I went black'n'white.

Willow Shields plays Katniss' rather useless younger sister Primrose in the film. Her dress was yellow, but I went black'n'white.

Stanley Tucci is trying to remember whether he's signed the Petition of "Tucci For Luthor" in Zack Snyder's Man of Steel Sequel. Meanwhile, I'm trying to remember whether I ever got around to starting that petition. I last photographed him looking equally dashing and debonair at  the premiere of Iron Man 3

Stanley Tucci is trying to remember whether he's signed the Petition of "Tucci For Luthor" in Zack Snyder's Man of Steel Sequel. Meanwhile, I'm trying to remember whether I ever got around to starting that petition. I last photographed him looking equally dashing and debonair at the premiere of Iron Man 3

I don't know who this is, but I would like to point out that it is raining. And I have a conference call with the US to look forward to soon after this. My life is so rock'n'roll.

I don't know who this is, but I would like to point out that it is raining. And I have a conference call with the US to look forward to soon after this. My life is so rock'n'roll.

Jeffrey Wright plays the improbably named Beetee in the movie, but is possibly better known as CIA Agent Felix Leiter in two of the Daniel Craig James Bond films, which he and I both just simultaneously remembered.

Jeffrey Wright plays the improbably named Beetee in the movie, but is possibly better known as CIA Agent Felix Leiter in two of the Daniel Craig James Bond films, which he and I both just simultaneously remembered.

Meanwhile, Josh Hutcherson plays love/not-love interest Peeta in the film. He's just remembered that District 12 isn't just about Coal (and Cake Icing), it's also about The Dancing. (The capital isn't really as repressive or evil as the Districts make out....)

Meanwhile, Josh Hutcherson plays love/not-love interest Peeta in the film. He's just remembered that District 12 isn't just about Coal (and Cake Icing), it's also about The Dancing. (The capital isn't really as repressive or evil as the Districts make out....)

Liam Hemsworth, meanwhile, plays Gail, the other side of the love triangle with Jennifer Lawrence's Katniss and Josh Hutcherson's Peeta at its apex (it's also possibly a quadrangle if you count Stanley Tucci's character's rather unhealthy obsession with Katniss)

Liam Hemsworth, meanwhile, plays Gail, the other side of the love triangle with Jennifer Lawrence's Katniss and Josh Hutcherson's Peeta at its apex (it's also possibly a quadrangle if you count Stanley Tucci's character's rather unhealthy obsession with Katniss)

A little bit of Hunger Games humour. I'm only viewing it with disdain because I didn't think of it first.

A little bit of Hunger Games humour. I'm only viewing it with disdain because I didn't think of it first.

Jennifer Lawrence signs autographs, and possibly proofreads implausible Hunger Games fanfiction.

Jennifer Lawrence signs autographs, and possibly proofreads implausible Hunger Games fanfiction.

The Amazing Donald Sutherland has arrived, and he seems fairly certain he's in the right place. According to imdb he's best known for the Italian Job remake (2003), which I agree with. M*A*S*H is well before my time, I haven't watched Pride & Prejudice and I don't know Ordinary People.

The Amazing Donald Sutherland has arrived, and he seems fairly certain he's in the right place. According to imdb he's best known for the Italian Job remake (2003), which I agree with. M*A*S*H is well before my time, I haven't watched Pride & Prejudice and I don't know Ordinary People.

"Jen told you to remove the love scene on page fourteen? I say put it back."

"Jen told you to remove the love scene on page fourteen? I say put it back."

What dress through yonder stage cometh? It is.... red. And feathery.

What dress through yonder stage cometh? It is.... red. And feathery.

"District 4? We're mostly into body origami. It's not one of the wealthier or more productive districts...."

"District 4? We're mostly into body origami. It's not one of the wealthier or more productive districts...."

Jenna Malone was in 'Contact' (1997), which I feel is an underrated sci-fi film, and also 'Sucker Punch' (2011), of which no amount of criticism shall EVER be enough.

Jenna Malone was in 'Contact' (1997), which I feel is an underrated sci-fi film, and also 'Sucker Punch' (2011), of which no amount of criticism shall EVER be enough.

"Donald RE-authorised the love scene? Unacceptable"

"Donald RE-authorised the love scene? Unacceptable"

The rubber-faced Sam Claflin, whom I've never previously heard of, seen, or photographed, brought along a very vocal crowd of fans (which surprised me as I was all set to assume this was a J-Lawz, L-Hemz and J-Hutchs event, with possible chance of S-Tuccs and E-Bankz support).

The rubber-faced Sam Claflin, whom I've never previously heard of, seen, or photographed, brought along a very vocal crowd of fans (which surprised me as I was all set to assume this was a J-Lawz, L-Hemz and J-Hutchs event, with possible chance of S-Tuccs and E-Bankz support).

"And then I was like Amgaaaaaaaahhhhh!!! It's Sam Claflin!!!!!"  But then he, like, remembered that HE was Sam Claflin, I'm guessing.

"And then I was like Amgaaaaaaaahhhhh!!! It's Sam Claflin!!!!!" But then he, like, remembered that HE was Sam Claflin, I'm guessing.

So to summarise, Sam Claflin was apparently in both Snow White and the Huntsman and Pirates of the Caribbean, both of which I watched but I can't remember him from. But he's well liked by the ladies, so there's that.

So to summarise, Sam Claflin was apparently in both Snow White and the Huntsman and Pirates of the Caribbean, both of which I watched but I can't remember him from. But he's well liked by the ladies, so there's that.

Jennifer Lawrence hits the stage and I briefly switch to fisheye lens. It's not staying on.

Jennifer Lawrence hits the stage and I briefly switch to fisheye lens. It's not staying on.

We made a connection earlier this year at the BAFTAS and it seems she hasn't forgotten. Good times! (She never called.... they never do)

We made a connection earlier this year at the BAFTAS and it seems she hasn't forgotten. Good times! (She never called.... they never do)

"We were here some two weeks ago to see your hunky brother Chris... which is a lie, of course. We were mostly here for Tom Hiddleston".  That was for  the premiere of "Thor the Dark World"

"We were here some two weeks ago to see your hunky brother Chris... which is a lie, of course. We were mostly here for Tom Hiddleston". That was for the premiere of "Thor the Dark World"

" So... have you always been this tall?"  Hmm... as chat-up lines go, it's also about the level I reliably achieve.

"So... have you always been this tall?" Hmm... as chat-up lines go, it's also about the level I reliably achieve.

Hemsworth The Younger is about to leave the stage. Let the screaming recommence.

Hemsworth The Younger is about to leave the stage. Let the screaming recommence.

"What do you mean 'there's a piece missing from my dress? We need to deal with that NOW!"

"What do you mean 'there's a piece missing from my dress? We need to deal with that NOW!"

"This is not solving the problem with the dress.... Though to be fair I can no longer see properly out of either eye now, so well done. Problem solved"

"This is not solving the problem with the dress.... Though to be fair I can no longer see properly out of either eye now, so well done. Problem solved"

"Sure, Katniss is great with a bow and arrow, but I carry a Beretta. Wanna see?"  Umm... no. Also, I think those are a packet of breath mints.

"Sure, Katniss is great with a bow and arrow, but I carry a Beretta. Wanna see?" Umm... no. Also, I think those are a packet of breath mints.

Josh Hutcherson still owes me five dollars, hence the reluctant eye contact.

Josh Hutcherson still owes me five dollars, hence the reluctant eye contact.

I like Elizabeth Banks a lot - between you and me, I actually really liked last year's Pitch Perfect and she was great in it. And I'll thank you not to hold my age, gender (or taste in music) against me. It's a great film. Go see it.

I like Elizabeth Banks a lot - between you and me, I actually really liked last year's Pitch Perfect and she was great in it. And I'll thank you not to hold my age, gender (or taste in music) against me. It's a great film. Go see it.

"Oh, just watch 'Pitch Perfect' already.... and this movie too, of course..."

"Oh, just watch 'Pitch Perfect' already.... and this movie too, of course..."

"Security! Some old dude in a suit scrawled over all over my nice new Hunger Games Book. I think he was the director..."

"Security! Some old dude in a suit scrawled over all over my nice new Hunger Games Book. I think he was the director..."

Along with this movie, and its two announced sequels, Francis Lawrence also directed Will Smith in 'I Am Legend', which I quite liked, and 'Constantine'..... which next to "Man Of Steel" earlier this year is one of only two movies I've walked out of as an adult.

Along with this movie, and its two announced sequels, Francis Lawrence also directed Will Smith in 'I Am Legend', which I quite liked, and 'Constantine'..... which next to "Man Of Steel" earlier this year is one of only two movies I've walked out of as an adult.

Francis Lawrence walks off a stage. Nobody mentions 'Constantine'.

Francis Lawrence walks off a stage. Nobody mentions 'Constantine'.

Elizabeth Banks and her incredible dress walk the red carpet unaccompanied, and I can't help her. Actually, all of sudden that view of the Odeon Leicester Square behind me has opened up some great additional photography opportunities!

Elizabeth Banks and her incredible dress walk the red carpet unaccompanied, and I can't help her. Actually, all of sudden that view of the Odeon Leicester Square behind me has opened up some great additional photography opportunities!

"You're going to make a 'catching fire' comment with the flames behind me, aren't you?"  No. I was just... looking at the coat. It's a red coat.

"You're going to make a 'catching fire' comment with the flames behind me, aren't you?" No. I was just... looking at the coat. It's a red coat.

"I can sign this 'Jennifer', 'JL', and possibly 'J-Lawz'... but I will not sign 'J-Lizzle'. I don't even know what that means"

"I can sign this 'Jennifer', 'JL', and possibly 'J-Lawz'... but I will not sign 'J-Lizzle'. I don't even know what that means"

Probably my favourite shot of the night in terms of 'art direction' and 'tone' - neither of which I had anything to do with in this case!

Probably my favourite shot of the night in terms of 'art direction' and 'tone' - neither of which I had anything to do with in this case!

And now it's time to join the crush to leave the centre part of Leicester Square, a route that takes me right past the giant mockingbird that everybody wants to pose next to.

The premiere occupied the entire centre part of Leicester Square, along with one whole vertex of the exterior, and a part of another corner for the drop-off. That's big in anyone's language. So is this giant Mockingjay statue. It's not quite  as large as "Thor's Hammer",  but part of me can't wait to see what they do for The Hobbit. (I took this photo later - it's nowhere near where I was)

The premiere occupied the entire centre part of Leicester Square, along with one whole vertex of the exterior, and a part of another corner for the drop-off. That's big in anyone's language. So is this giant Mockingjay statue. It's not quite as large as "Thor's Hammer", but part of me can't wait to see what they do for The Hobbit. (I took this photo later - it's nowhere near where I was)

So... that was pretty major. And I'm pretty tired. And it's another one for the "Archive of Movie Premieres"

Until next time!

Incidentally, if you ever want to know when I post one of these journals, feel free to follow me on twitter @berndt2_photo, or on facebook at premieresdotco.