04 May - The 'Alien Covenant' Global Premiere

May 4th, 2017

There's been a bit of a lull in premieres in London for the past few weeks. Sure, the studio with the Mouse's Ears flew all the cast of Guardians of The Galaxy Vol2 all the way to London, put them up in hotels, booked a venue, hired security, put in place barriers... but then they had their cars drive directly into a side-gate without so much as lowering their windows, let alone slowing down. Thanks, Disney.

So perhaps it's fate that today, on Disney's May The Fourth Star Wars Day, another franchise had its world premiere in London.

Here's how it went down:

"Well, it's no Sistine Chapel, but when we're finished with it, it's going to have more goo and slime than Leonardo ever dreamed of..."

"Well, it's no Sistine Chapel, but when we're finished with it, it's going to have more goo and slime than Leonardo ever dreamed of..."

"Yo, everyone. We've got a little lost kid looking for his mother. Goes by the name of 'Wallace'. Or maybe he's just hissing at me"

"Yo, everyone. We've got a little lost kid looking for his mother. Goes by the name of 'Wallace'. Or maybe he's just hissing at me"

Officiating over the warmup festivities at this premiere (and apologising to angry mothers) was your good friend and mine Hakeem Mr Impact and DJ Xenomorph

Officiating over the warmup festivities at this premiere (and apologising to angry mothers) was your good friend and mine Hakeem Mr Impact and DJ Xenomorph

"They should put red crosses over all the actors whose characters didn't make it out of this movie alive. Just so we'd know what kind of questions might offend them..."

"They should put red crosses over all the actors whose characters didn't make it out of this movie alive. Just so we'd know what kind of questions might offend them..."

Along with the majority of cast and some kind of four-wheeled Audi moon buggy (?), this premiere also featured a number of 'famous' (?) online bloggers, hosts and 'influencers'. Which sucks, because how does this website with its almost dozen views weekly, not count as a key influencer in the valuable 'skeptical ba5tard' demographic?

Along with the majority of cast and some kind of four-wheeled Audi moon buggy (?), this premiere also featured a number of 'famous' (?) online bloggers, hosts and 'influencers'. Which sucks, because how does this website with its almost dozen views weekly, not count as a key influencer in the valuable 'skeptical ba5tard' demographic?

Benedict Wong may possibly be best known as some kind of Librarian in the Disney/Marvel movie 'Doctor Strange', but he was also (spoiler) one of the last people to die in this movie's predecessor film, 'Prometheus'

Benedict Wong may possibly be best known as some kind of Librarian in the Disney/Marvel movie 'Doctor Strange', but he was also (spoiler) one of the last people to die in this movie's predecessor film, 'Prometheus'

"I'm a Prometheus Force Ghost in THIS movie!"

"I'm a Prometheus Force Ghost in THIS movie!"

Sadly, Australia's own Tess Haubrich (who is in this movie and might even wear this shiny dress and that awesome hairstyle in it) was not interviewed on stage, and therefore this was the only plausible photograph of her..

Sadly, Australia's own Tess Haubrich (who is in this movie and might even wear this shiny dress and that awesome hairstyle in it) was not interviewed on stage, and therefore this was the only plausible photograph of her..

"Is the lady behind me still doing that thing? Please tell her to stop" - Benjamin Rigby was previously in (but possibly not at the premiere of) the movie "Lion" and plays the possibly-named-for-copyright-infringement-avoidance character of "Ledward" in Alien Covenant.

"Is the lady behind me still doing that thing? Please tell her to stop" - Benjamin Rigby was previously in (but possibly not at the premiere of) the movie "Lion" and plays the possibly-named-for-copyright-infringement-avoidance character of "Ledward" in Alien Covenant.

"A sickly green tint on every photo in the journal because this is an Alien premiere? Sir Ridley might not, but I approve!"

"A sickly green tint on every photo in the journal because this is an Alien premiere? Sir Ridley might not, but I approve!"

Meanwhile, I really can't provide cynical commentary on the phenomenon of Awesome Online Influencer Lady - the clasp of her selfie-stick contains a mini-Hasbro Hoverboard from Back to the Future part2. Which is very cool (very cool).

Meanwhile, I really can't provide cynical commentary on the phenomenon of Awesome Online Influencer Lady - the clasp of her selfie-stick contains a mini-Hasbro Hoverboard from Back to the Future part2. Which is very cool (very cool).

"And then I felt these claws.... or were they pincers? ... fingers? prostheses? Anyway around my throat. It was either an Alien or it was Ridley and he was unhappy about something. I can't remember. What was the question again? - Demian Bichir, along with being in this movie, was most recently in (but not at the premiere of "The Hateful Eight")

"And then I felt these claws.... or were they pincers? ... fingers? prostheses? Anyway around my throat. It was either an Alien or it was Ridley and he was unhappy about something. I can't remember. What was the question again? - Demian Bichir, along with being in this movie, was most recently in (but not at the premiere of "The Hateful Eight")

"OMG your lower jaw detaches like an Alien! Oh, those are your dentures. Sorry, ma'am" - the awesomely named Uli Leukefu was, according to imdb.com, (which is never wrong in such things) in three episodes of Australian Idol back in 2004!

"OMG your lower jaw detaches like an Alien! Oh, those are your dentures. Sorry, ma'am" - the awesomely named Uli Leukefu was, according to imdb.com, (which is never wrong in such things) in three episodes of Australian Idol back in 2004!

"I'm not going to stand over there. It's clearly a trap"

"I'm not going to stand over there. It's clearly a trap"

"This guy over here remembers me from back when I was blue... and I'm not talking psychologically" - Billy Crudup is arguably best known for being Doctor Manhattan in what I will argue is one of only three of director Zack Snyder's movies that didn't suck : "Watchmen" (2009)

"This guy over here remembers me from back when I was blue... and I'm not talking psychologically" - Billy Crudup is arguably best known for being Doctor Manhattan in what I will argue is one of only three of director Zack Snyder's movies that didn't suck : "Watchmen" (2009)

"It was digitally enhanced. But not by much. And I'm not saying how much"

"It was digitally enhanced. But not by much. And I'm not saying how much"

"I said not THAT much. And that's why I ain't signing it"

"I said not THAT much. And that's why I ain't signing it"

"I didn't scream like a little girl in fear like they're showing in that trailer. They dubbed me. With a little girl's voice. They can do that with technology, Edith" - Danny McBride's imdb.com filmography includes the fact that he played the voice of 'Honey Mustard' in the animated 'Sausage Party'

"I didn't scream like a little girl in fear like they're showing in that trailer. They dubbed me. With a little girl's voice. They can do that with technology, Edith" - Danny McBride's imdb.com filmography includes the fact that he played the voice of 'Honey Mustard' in the animated 'Sausage Party'

"My eyebrow won't go any higher than that, bro... take the photo already"

"My eyebrow won't go any higher than that, bro... take the photo already"

"I'm not slowing down or stopping. I'm currently working on another movie as I'm walking to the stage" - I've photographed the highly prolific Sir Ridley Scott at premieres as diverse as those for 'The Counselor', 'The Martian', 'Exodus Gods and Kings' and even the original 'Prometheus' back in 2012.

"I'm not slowing down or stopping. I'm currently working on another movie as I'm walking to the stage" - I've photographed the highly prolific Sir Ridley Scott at premieres as diverse as those for 'The Counselor', 'The Martian', 'Exodus Gods and Kings' and even the original 'Prometheus' back in 2012.

"I'm thinking of making two more Prometheus sequels, two Alien prequels and a parallelquel to the third sequel. That, and maybe a couple of romantic comedies...."

"I'm thinking of making two more Prometheus sequels, two Alien prequels and a parallelquel to the third sequel. That, and maybe a couple of romantic comedies...."

"Anyone want to take this question? I believe he's going to ask me what it was like to work with Ridley Scott...."

"Anyone want to take this question? I believe he's going to ask me what it was like to work with Ridley Scott...."

Meanwhile, in the world of making friends and influencing people... I will admit that Cute Online Influence Lady's spidery/face-hugger inspired ?necklace? is quite impressive and she's wearing it well.

Meanwhile, in the world of making friends and influencing people... I will admit that Cute Online Influence Lady's spidery/face-hugger inspired ?necklace? is quite impressive and she's wearing it well.

"It's pronouned 'Jussie Smollett'. None of the letters are silent" - Jussie Smollett is in this movie, prior to which he was possibly best known for being in the 1994 Elijah Wood / Bruce Willis movie 'North' which I can't really remember.

"It's pronouned 'Jussie Smollett'. None of the letters are silent" - Jussie Smollett is in this movie, prior to which he was possibly best known for being in the 1994 Elijah Wood / Bruce Willis movie 'North' which I can't really remember.

"I took the mike off that DJ guy. He wasn't using it to rhyme...." - Michael Fassbender played the role of the android 'David' in 'Prometheus' and although I'm trying to avoid too many spoilers before I see the film, apparently he plays the role of 'Walter' in this one.

"I took the mike off that DJ guy. He wasn't using it to rhyme...." - Michael Fassbender played the role of the android 'David' in 'Prometheus' and although I'm trying to avoid too many spoilers before I see the film, apparently he plays the role of 'Walter' in this one.

"Why yes, I AM a dream to work with. Oh, wait... you were asking me about working with Ridley"

"Why yes, I AM a dream to work with. Oh, wait... you were asking me about working with Ridley"

"And so I was like.... we're in International Waters so yes, while it's not technically legal, it's also not technically illegal..."- Michael Fassbender was most recently in 'Assassins Creed' but I've photographed him at premieres like 'The Light Between Oceans (2016)', and the (I think) hugely underrated 'Steve Jobs (2015)' which Katherine Waterston (right) was also in.

"And so I was like.... we're in International Waters so yes, while it's not technically legal, it's also not technically illegal..."- Michael Fassbender was most recently in 'Assassins Creed' but I've photographed him at premieres like 'The Light Between Oceans (2016)', and the (I think) hugely underrated 'Steve Jobs (2015)' which Katherine Waterston (right) was also in.

"And then you got out of the car at this premiere and people were shouting 'sign for us, Michael' and 'pose for a selfie with us, Michael' and 'Be the godfather of my child, Michael'... and some of those were your CO-STARS, Michael...."

"And then you got out of the car at this premiere and people were shouting 'sign for us, Michael' and 'pose for a selfie with us, Michael' and 'Be the godfather of my child, Michael'... and some of those were your CO-STARS, Michael...."

"The dress? It's impractical for fighting aliens, but when they see it they do sometimes slow down to admire the weave pattern...." Katherine Waterston was also in (and at the premiere of) 'Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them' last year.

"The dress? It's impractical for fighting aliens, but when they see it they do sometimes slow down to admire the weave pattern...." Katherine Waterston was also in (and at the premiere of) 'Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them' last year.

"Girls kissing. I know, right??"

"Girls kissing. I know, right??"

"I didn't get my mobile phone out in time. Can you do it again?"

"I didn't get my mobile phone out in time. Can you do it again?"

"No, don't take my hand and help me down the stairs... hand me a flame thrower."

"No, don't take my hand and help me down the stairs... hand me a flame thrower."

And so, that was that. A pretty good premiere, especially when measured by the standards of companies who are much bigger, much wealther, and elect not to have them when going 95% of the way to having them when they don't have them. So.... big thanks to Twentieth Century Fox for keeping the dream alive!

Oh, and weirdly, just as it was time to go (and just like he'd done back in 2012 at the premiere of 'Prometheus'), Tom Hardy showed up!

Tom Hardy is looking at me. And I'm looking a Tom Hardy. And we've made a connection. And I loved him in Mad Max Fury Road. And with that chance, that moment, that connection, I just want to stare into his dreamy eyes as I softly ask him: "Hey, do you have Charlize Theron's phone number? She was also great in Mad Max Fury Road!"

Tom Hardy is looking at me. And I'm looking a Tom Hardy. And we've made a connection. And I loved him in Mad Max Fury Road. And with that chance, that moment, that connection, I just want to stare into his dreamy eyes as I softly ask him: "Hey, do you have Charlize Theron's phone number? She was also great in Mad Max Fury Road!"

"Fine. I'll sign your cap. But I'm keeping the lid on the sharpie"

"Fine. I'll sign your cap. But I'm keeping the lid on the sharpie"

So... that was kind of a fun premiere, and (finally) another one for The Archive of Movie Premieres.

Until next time!

ps. if you ever want to find out when I post one of these premieres (or would like me to photograph your premiere or event or motion picture) feel free to follow me on facebook at premieresdotco, or on twitter at berndt2_photo.