26 Nov - The 'Aquaman' World Premiere

November 26th, 2018.

I only got home at midnight tonight (whereas for yesterdays Ralph Breaks The Internet premiere yesterday I was in BED by 10pm)… so much of this journal is/was ‘the best I can do by 1am for a 5am alarm I’m committing to get up for. And there’s also another premiere the next day AND one the day after that.

But you don’t care about that. Like everyone, you care about the DC Cinematic Universe’s latest addition: Aquaman (?). Here’s how it went down:

It’s from the people who brought you all your favourite DC Cinematic Universe Movies, like <insert any movie other than ‘Wonder Woman’> !!!

It’s from the people who brought you all your favourite DC Cinematic Universe Movies, like <insert any movie other than ‘Wonder Woman’> !!!

Yarrrr… she be a fine carpet, placid and blue … but sadly I’ll not be walkin’ upon ye, or be anywhere near ye. I’ve got an 8pm appointment at North Greenwich (Ennio Moriccone concert, ticket purchased months ago). What to do…..

Yarrrr… she be a fine carpet, placid and blue… but sadly I’ll not be walkin’ upon ye, or be anywhere near ye. I’ve got an 8pm appointment at North Greenwich (Ennio Moriccone concert, ticket purchased months ago). What to do…..

While I pondered my options, I found a spot in a nearby cafe that just happened to be overlooking part of the proceedings. The cappuccino was excellent and the pistachio cheesecake outstanding, incidentally.

While I pondered my options, I found a spot in a nearby cafe that just happened to be overlooking part of the proceedings. The cappuccino was excellent and the pistachio cheesecake outstanding, incidentally.

“Well, it’s a strangely metal-gloved arm holding a trident coming out of the ocean… it weird if the dog DIDN’T find it a bit suspicious…”

“Well, it’s a strangely metal-gloved arm holding a trident coming out of the ocean… it weird if the dog DIDN’T find it a bit suspicious…”

When you find the exact pose, angle and lighting for that selfie with Jason Momoa and you just ain’t movin’ for anyone or any reason until that happens.

When you find the exact pose, angle and lighting for that selfie with Jason Momoa and you just ain’t movin’ for anyone or any reason until that happens.

“Is it real, you ask? Well, that depends on what your definition of ‘is’, ‘it’, and ‘real’ is. But it’s yes to at least two of those…”

“Is it real, you ask? Well, that depends on what your definition of ‘is’, ‘it’, and ‘real’ is. But it’s yes to at least two of those…”

“Look! Up in the sky! Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Actually… it almost certainly isn’t that guy”

“Look! Up in the sky! Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Actually… it almost certainly isn’t that guy”

“Security? I don’t know these people and they’re showing much more familiarity than I’m comfortable with”

“Security? I don’t know these people and they’re showing much more familiarity than I’m comfortable with”

“No, I will not give a high-five to a man with such a cryptic ring configuration. Explain what it means first” -  it’s Jason Momoa : the titular Aquaman himself. I assume he hitched his seahorse outside a nearby saloon (or Lego Store) and ambled onto the carpet leaving wet bootprints in his wake.

“No, I will not give a high-five to a man with such a cryptic ring configuration. Explain what it means first” - it’s Jason Momoa : the titular Aquaman himself. I assume he hitched his seahorse outside a nearby saloon (or Lego Store) and ambled onto the carpet leaving wet bootprints in his wake.

“Yeah, but imma keep callin’ it a fork anyway. You gonna stop me?” ”….” ”I thought not”

“Yeah, but imma keep callin’ it a fork anyway. You gonna stop me?”
”….”
”I thought not”

“You can ask me any question you like, bro. As long as it’s not about the man-bun. Your hairstyle disqualifies you from asking”

“You can ask me any question you like, bro. As long as it’s not about the man-bun. Your hairstyle disqualifies you from asking”

“By having a higher leg cut I can stay dry in shallow water. See? I did come dressed in theme!!”  I have no idea who this is, but I’m comfortable with the colour, even if my camera’s white-balance remains wary.

“By having a higher leg cut I can stay dry in shallow water. See? I did come dressed in theme!!”
I have no idea who this is, but I’m comfortable with the colour, even if my camera’s white-balance remains wary.

“The look of disdainful disinterest on the face of the lady on my left is challenging my self-image, and in a world of sycophantic yes-men and yes-women, it’s refreshing”

“The look of disdainful disinterest on the face of the lady on my left is challenging my self-image, and in a world of sycophantic yes-men and yes-women, it’s refreshing”

“High five? I’m from Hollywood, bro. That’s not how we do them there”  It’s Patrick Wilson! His last superhero outing was    ‘Watchmen’ in 2009   … or perhaps ‘Stoker’ if like me you kind of over-like that movie.

“High five? I’m from Hollywood, bro. That’s not how we do them there”
It’s Patrick Wilson! His last superhero outing was ‘Watchmen’ in 2009… or perhaps ‘Stoker’ if like me you kind of over-like that movie.

“Staying hydrated. So very important”  - I was actually disproportionately pleased to have taken a photo of Jason Momoa taking a sip of water, but then Amber Heard hadn’t shown up yet….

“Staying hydrated. So very important” - I was actually disproportionately pleased to have taken a photo of Jason Momoa taking a sip of water, but then Amber Heard hadn’t shown up yet….

If you only take one photo of Amber Heard framed by light-beams while wearing a shower-cap, why not (a) make it this one, or

If you only take one photo of Amber Heard framed by light-beams while wearing a shower-cap, why not (a) make it this one, or

(b) perhaps this one? Or even more, if the opportunity allows? (I checked my watch at this point, and for another twenty five minutes… it allows)

(b) perhaps this one? Or even more, if the opportunity allows?
(I checked my watch at this point, and for another twenty five minutes… it allows)

“No pressure, but each of these rhinestones was hand-carved and is insured for $25,000. And we went with the No Excess plan….”

“No pressure, but each of these rhinestones was hand-carved and is insured for $25,000. And we went with the No Excess plan….”

“I assume this means you think I’m pretty?” -  I’ve photographed Amber Heard at such premieres as    ‘Mortdecai’   , (briefly)    ‘Black Mass’   , and    'Magic Mike XXL’   . And even though I photographed the stunning    Gal Gadot yesterday   … yeah, Amber Heard is pretty.

“I assume this means you think I’m pretty?” - I’ve photographed Amber Heard at such premieres as ‘Mortdecai’, (briefly) ‘Black Mass’, and 'Magic Mike XXL’. And even though I photographed the stunning Gal Gadot yesterday… yeah, Amber Heard is pretty.

“If I can’t get eye-contact from Amber Heard I might as well hang myself right here and now” ”But she hasn’t even come to our part yet” ”I can’t take that risk, Frank….”

“If I can’t get eye-contact from Amber Heard I might as well hang myself right here and now”
”But she hasn’t even come to our part yet”
”I can’t take that risk, Frank….”

…. every now and then I can’t immediately think of a comment for a photo. All I’ve got is   “nice hat?”   but even behind the pane of glass I’m behind, I don’t want to make a bad impression.

…. every now and then I can’t immediately think of a comment for a photo. All I’ve got is “nice hat?” but even behind the pane of glass I’m behind, I don’t want to make a bad impression.

“I come dressed like this and you wear what you’re wearing that?  I’ve temporarily forgotten the name of the character Amber Heard plays in the movie… I think it doesn’t matter.

“I come dressed like this and you wear what you’re wearing that?
I’ve temporarily forgotten the name of the character Amber Heard plays in the movie… I think it doesn’t matter.

“I thought we’d specially trained those lobsters to carry my dress’ train on the carpet?? …. well, WAKE THEM!!”

“I thought we’d specially trained those lobsters to carry my dress’ train on the carpet??
…. well, WAKE THEM!!”

Is it more important to get (yet another) shot of Amber Heard, or catch the director of the film in focus in a rare moment of exuberance? I… stand by my decision.

Is it more important to get (yet another) shot of Amber Heard, or catch the director of the film in focus in a rare moment of exuberance? I… stand by my decision.

“Don’t even try hand signals with me, dude”  Director James Wan looks all of nineteen years old.  “Azn Genes, baby”  is how one of my (Asian) friends once put it. Me and my vaguely Romanian / Balkan ancestors will get back to you…

“Don’t even try hand signals with me, dude”
Director James Wan looks all of nineteen years old. “Azn Genes, baby” is how one of my (Asian) friends once put it. Me and my vaguely Romanian / Balkan ancestors will get back to you…

“What character do I play in the film? I don’t know… I was mostly wearing dots and standing in front of a green-screen. Maybe a forgetful blue tang called Dory? Or an overly paternal clownfish looking for his son Nemo? The cheque cleared, though, so this movie’s Awesome.”

“What character do I play in the film? I don’t know… I was mostly wearing dots and standing in front of a green-screen. Maybe a forgetful blue tang called Dory? Or an overly paternal clownfish looking for his son Nemo? The cheque cleared, though, so this movie’s Awesome.”

“I’m putting my name onscreen as having directed a DC movie and you call my HAIRSTYLE ‘brave’??”

“I’m putting my name onscreen as having directed a DC movie and you call my HAIRSTYLE ‘brave’??”

“What happened to the guy whose hand had the crazy ring configuration?”  It’s composer Rupert Gregson-Williams!! He also composed the excellent score to last year’s “Wonder Woman”. Assuming it’s not illegal where you are, go onto youtube and listen to    “We Are All To Blame”    -it’s not just true, it’s a great track.

“What happened to the guy whose hand had the crazy ring configuration?”
It’s composer Rupert Gregson-Williams!! He also composed the excellent score to last year’s “Wonder Woman”. Assuming it’s not illegal where you are, go onto youtube and listen to “We Are All To Blame” -it’s not just true, it’s a great track.

“Even the composer scored a full high-five invitation and you’re barely giving me two fingers? What’s that all about?”

“Even the composer scored a full high-five invitation and you’re barely giving me two fingers? What’s that all about?”

“Well… we tried to get the dolphins to sing in unison and that didn’t work because they were out of the water and in some distress, so we tried to sink the orchestra so they were underwater and that didn’t work so well either….. in the end we made a compromise”

“Well… we tried to get the dolphins to sing in unison and that didn’t work because they were out of the water and in some distress, so we tried to sink the orchestra so they were underwater and that didn’t work so well either….. in the end we made a compromise”

“I think he thinks they’re asking him questions about the fourth film in the Expendables franchise” ”But they haven’t made one….” ”That’s what makes it so interesting….”

“I think he thinks they’re asking him questions about the fourth film in the Expendables franchise”
”But they haven’t made one….”
”That’s what makes it so interesting….”

“If this makes me look like I’m auditioning for a gender-swapped Joker role, I will never forgive you…”

“If this makes me look like I’m auditioning for a gender-swapped Joker role, I will never forgive you…”

“… but if I get the role I might.”

“… but if I get the role I might.”

“The Dress kind of goes where it wants…. but okay if it wants to go over here, I’ll follow”

“The Dress kind of goes where it wants…. but okay if it wants to go over here, I’ll follow”

So… that was that. At 6:45pm I headed off to the Northern Line to get to the Jubilee Line and zip across to North Greenwich and the O2 for the Ennio Moriccone concert…. where they let me take in my 40Megapixel Huawei phone, my full-frame 36Megapixel Pentax…. but confiscated my fisheye lens 12Megapixel GOPRO because (and I quote) “it’s a recording device”. Complete idiots, and meanwhile two sweet old ladies near me had their mobile phone on a railing mounted on a mini TRIPOD covered by a programme and they recorded the whole concert and nobody even noticed… (well…. I noticed)

But the point is : I did a World Premiere and a Final London Concert conducted by a 90 year old film scoring legend ON THE SAME NIGHT.

It was excellent, it goes without saying.

It was excellent, it goes without saying.

Until next time!

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