10 Oct - The BFI LFF "Widows" Opening Gala

October 10th, 2018.

It’s been a week since my last premiere, the awfulness of “Johnny English Strikes Again” a thankfully distant memory as we head into what is more or less my favourite time of year : London Film Festival. This year like last year I’m aiming to head down every day and see how many of these I can do before the requirements of sleep and mental acuity break me entirely as a human being. But hey… it’s only day 1.

Here’s how it went down:

It’s BFI London Film Festival, and for the first time since time immemorial (?) it’s not at the Odeon Leicester Square : that cinema (diagonally to the right of Cineworld (nee Empire) is still being renovated after almost a year of being closed).

It’s BFI London Film Festival, and for the first time since time immemorial (?) it’s not at the Odeon Leicester Square : that cinema (diagonally to the right of Cineworld (nee Empire) is still being renovated after almost a year of being closed).

The pen for this one is small, undivided, and crowded with the kind of autograph dealers your Mum would look at you twice for voluntarily associating with. Somehow, despite having wristband #81, I appear to have found myself a front-row spot. Most of the people to my left are both taller and more manic than me… so that’s not so good.

The pen for this one is small, undivided, and crowded with the kind of autograph dealers your Mum would look at you twice for voluntarily associating with. Somehow, despite having wristband #81, I appear to have found myself a front-row spot. Most of the people to my left are both taller and more manic than me… so that’s not so good.

Good news : they’re cleaning the carpet and have their top man on it. Bad news : it’s the public pens on the other side of the barriers that are where the lower levels of hygiene are to be found.

Good news : they’re cleaning the carpet and have their top man on it. Bad news : it’s the public pens on the other side of the barriers that are where the lower levels of hygiene are to be found.

Sadly The List does not contain all the stars of this film : Liam Neeson, Colin Farrell, Robert Duvall, and Australia’s own Elizabeth Debicki and Jacki Weaver sadly did not attend. There’s also a smiling picture of Viola Davis on that sheet of paper… but I’m not sure anyone has ever seen her smile…

Sadly The List does not contain all the stars of this film : Liam Neeson, Colin Farrell, Robert Duvall, and Australia’s own Elizabeth Debicki and Jacki Weaver sadly did not attend. There’s also a smiling picture of Viola Davis on that sheet of paper… but I’m not sure anyone has ever seen her smile…

As far as I’m aware (and my records are sketchy and it’s late and there are wolves out as I’m typing this)… this is actually your friend and mine Mr Impact’s first BFI London Film Festival hosting gig. He and his tame DJ “Singles and Loving It” had no freeness to give away at this event, but the dance moves were cool and the rhymes were occasional.

As far as I’m aware (and my records are sketchy and it’s late and there are wolves out as I’m typing this)… this is actually your friend and mine Mr Impact’s first BFI London Film Festival hosting gig. He and his tame DJ “Singles and Loving It” had no freeness to give away at this event, but the dance moves were cool and the rhymes were occasional.

“I don’t care how charismatic he sounds, he’s not the director of the film : don’t interview him and whatever you do, don’t ask him what it’s like to work with Viola Davis! ” - Steve McQueen (pictured) won an Oscar for directing    “12 Years A Slave” which also had a BFI LFF premiere.

“I don’t care how charismatic he sounds, he’s not the director of the film : don’t interview him and whatever you do, don’t ask him what it’s like to work with Viola Davis!” - Steve McQueen (pictured) won an Oscar for directing “12 Years A Slave” which also had a BFI LFF premiere.

Viola Davis arrives, the red carpet is entirely crowded, and she quickly begins to do interviews. Meanwhile, although there is a small stage for this event, all attendees on it are interviewed facing AWAY from the crowd. So I guess this is my ‘if all else fails’ shot of the actress.

Viola Davis arrives, the red carpet is entirely crowded, and she quickly begins to do interviews. Meanwhile, although there is a small stage for this event, all attendees on it are interviewed facing AWAY from the crowd. So I guess this is my ‘if all else fails’ shot of the actress.

In better news, Daniel Kaluuya has elected to brave the rampant autograph dealers and their probably infinite supply of 8x10 glossy photographs.

In better news, Daniel Kaluuya has elected to brave the rampant autograph dealers and their probably infinite supply of 8x10 glossy photographs.

“Possibly the worst phone saver screen I’ve ever seen. Next question?”

“Possibly the worst phone saver screen I’ve ever seen. Next question?”

“Contort the camera however you like, I still wasn’t ‘that guy from Interstellar’ “  - Daniel Kaluuya has, however been in such movies as Get Out, Black Panther, and Sicario

“Contort the camera however you like, I still wasn’t ‘that guy from Interstellar’ “ - Daniel Kaluuya has, however been in such movies as Get Out, Black Panther, and Sicario

Viola Davis. Not exactly smiling, but not exactly punching and headbutting autograph dealers either. I’m calling it a mixed result for justice in London this evening.

Viola Davis. Not exactly smiling, but not exactly punching and headbutting autograph dealers either. I’m calling it a mixed result for justice in London this evening.

“If I’m looking at this correctly, Jim, somebody on ebay who has the same username as me has just tripled my bid for this item. So what I’m going to do is triple HIS bid and show him what’s what”  - Arnon Milchan is a producer on this film, and the top four imdb movies he’s also produced is the impressive quartet of L.A.Confidential, The Revenant, 12 Years a Slave and Birdman.

“If I’m looking at this correctly, Jim, somebody on ebay who has the same username as me has just tripled my bid for this item. So what I’m going to do is triple HIS bid and show him what’s what” - Arnon Milchan is a producer on this film, and the top four imdb movies he’s also produced is the impressive quartet of L.A.Confidential, The Revenant, 12 Years a Slave and Birdman.

“I paid about nine times more than I wanted, but I bet that guy with the same username as me is crying into his breakfast cereal that I outbid him in the end”

“I paid about nine times more than I wanted, but I bet that guy with the same username as me is crying into his breakfast cereal that I outbid him in the end”

It’s Hans Zimmer! He composed the music for Steve McQueen’s last movie (as well as this one) - AND earlier this year I found a reason to give thanks to the English Football (soccer) team : because they qualified for the finals of the World Cup, a whole slew of people who had tickets to one of his screentalks returned theirs The Game instead, which meant I was able to pick one up for face value and hear him talk instead.

It’s Hans Zimmer! He composed the music for Steve McQueen’s last movie (as well as this one) - AND earlier this year I found a reason to give thanks to the English Football (soccer) team : because they qualified for the finals of the World Cup, a whole slew of people who had tickets to one of his screentalks returned theirs The Game instead, which meant I was able to pick one up for face value and hear him talk instead.

“Your lack of concern for football, soccer, or more or less any sport has left you unhealthy yet served you well” . Indeed. My signed ‘For Your Consideration’ The Dark Knight Rises soundtracks is evidence of that.

“Your lack of concern for football, soccer, or more or less any sport has left you unhealthy yet served you well”. Indeed. My signed ‘For Your Consideration’ The Dark Knight Rises soundtracks is evidence of that.

“You’re right, I did technically compose that… I’m just saying it was never actually legally released in the format you’re getting me to sign…” -  among movies Hans Zimmer has composed the music for (and attended premieres of) are :    Man of Steel   ,    Rush    and    Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice   . His ten (!!) Oscar Nominations are not for any of those, though.

“You’re right, I did technically compose that… I’m just saying it was never actually legally released in the format you’re getting me to sign…” - among movies Hans Zimmer has composed the music for (and attended premieres of) are : Man of Steel, Rush and Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice. His ten (!!) Oscar Nominations are not for any of those, though.

“Truly one of the worst phone desktop themes I’ve ever seen”  - I don’t know for sure who this is (Ann Mitchell ?), but in the unceasing and unco-ordinated crush of the red carpet, I currently don’t have anyone else to photograph. And I missed author Lynda La Plante (unless this is her)

“Truly one of the worst phone desktop themes I’ve ever seen” - I don’t know for sure who this is (Ann Mitchell ?), but in the unceasing and unco-ordinated crush of the red carpet, I currently don’t have anyone else to photograph. And I missed author Lynda La Plante (unless this is her)

It’s the look that says :  “Everyone wants to know what Michelle Rodriguez and Daniel Kaluuya were like to work with… I just want to know what they’re selling for 50% off behind those black hoardings…”

It’s the look that says : “Everyone wants to know what Michelle Rodriguez and Daniel Kaluuya were like to work with… I just want to know what they’re selling for 50% off behind those black hoardings…”

“It’s a great movie, but I wasn’t involved with The Great Escape. That was… well… okay, fine. Your mistake is a mistake anyone could have made, but you made it” . The “fans” to my left that this premiere were 9/10 for enthusiasm, but about 3/10 for actual knowledge of what was going on, who people were, or what their names were.

“It’s a great movie, but I wasn’t involved with The Great Escape. That was… well… okay, fine. Your mistake is a mistake anyone could have made, but you made it”. The “fans” to my left that this premiere were 9/10 for enthusiasm, but about 3/10 for actual knowledge of what was going on, who people were, or what their names were.

Viola Davis Update : I appear to have been judged by Viola Davis, and I’ve been found wanting. That or she’s just come from the 50% Off Sale behind her and the results weren’t worth it.

Viola Davis Update : I appear to have been judged by Viola Davis, and I’ve been found wanting. That or she’s just come from the 50% Off Sale behind her and the results weren’t worth it.

“What are those people looking at? Well, I’ll be facing in that direction momentarily and I’ll let you know”  - it’s Terry Gilliam! His movie is also being shown at this year’s festival. Not in this journal: director Edgar Wright (ditto) - who rushed past when the excitable guy on my left screamed out “Edward!! EDWARD!! EDGARD!!”.

“What are those people looking at? Well, I’ll be facing in that direction momentarily and I’ll let you know” - it’s Terry Gilliam! His movie is also being shown at this year’s festival. Not in this journal: director Edgar Wright (ditto) - who rushed past when the excitable guy on my left screamed out “Edward!! EDWARD!! EDGARD!!”.

The crowd parts and who do I photograph but…. well…. let’s just say “not Michelle Rodriguez” and leave it at that.

The crowd parts and who do I photograph but…. well…. let’s just say “not Michelle Rodriguez” and leave it at that.

I don’t know who this is but in possibly unrelated news, I’ve never seen Viola Davis smile before so I feel like I’m at a considerable disadvantage here.

I don’t know who this is but in possibly unrelated news, I’ve never seen Viola Davis smile before so I feel like I’m at a considerable disadvantage here.

So Michelle Rodriguez has entered our area and the population density of the public pen is doing the kind of thing that locusts with a good supply of grain do, except more loudly and more messily. (Fortunately I’ve photographed her previously at the premieres of    “Avatar”    and one of the    Fast & Furiouses    )

So Michelle Rodriguez has entered our area and the population density of the public pen is doing the kind of thing that locusts with a good supply of grain do, except more loudly and more messily. (Fortunately I’ve photographed her previously at the premieres of “Avatar” and one of the Fast & Furiouses )

“I’m sorry I lack the third arm your requested gang sign appears to require, but I can endorse your twitter feed or something if you want?”  - Michelle Rodriguez probably signed and interacted more than anyone from the cast (with Hans Zimmer and Daniel Kaluuya close behind).

“I’m sorry I lack the third arm your requested gang sign appears to require, but I can endorse your twitter feed or something if you want?” - Michelle Rodriguez probably signed and interacted more than anyone from the cast (with Hans Zimmer and Daniel Kaluuya close behind).

“I love your fan art. I assume that’s fan art… rather than a crayon drawing of a piece of string that looks nothing like me, decorated with what might be stains from a coffee mug and ketchup packet”  Because if you can’t tell what it is, it’s probably Art.

“I love your fan art. I assume that’s fan art… rather than a crayon drawing of a piece of string that looks nothing like me, decorated with what might be stains from a coffee mug and ketchup packet”
Because if you can’t tell what it is, it’s probably Art.

“That’s Zoe Saldana… but sure I’ll sign it!”  - for an idea of the kind of madness this premiere has descended to on my side of the barrier : none of the hands coming from beneath and/or beside this photo are mine.

“That’s Zoe Saldana… but sure I’ll sign it!” - for an idea of the kind of madness this premiere has descended to on my side of the barrier : none of the hands coming from beneath and/or beside this photo are mine.

“I got out of there alive… and I feel better already”

“I got out of there alive… and I feel better already”

So… that was that. Premiere 1 of a 12 (ish?) day festival, +1 for the archive of premieres, and (I’m going to say) hopefully the first of many late nights. It should be fun.

Until next time!

ps. if you want to know when I post one of these journals, feel free to follow me on facebook at premieresdotco, or on twitter at berndt2_photo.