5th Oct 2019 - The BFI LFF 'JoJo Rabbit' Premiere

October 5th, 2019.

I’d just come from Embankment Garden Cinemas, from the premiere for ‘The Report’ with Adam Driver and Annette Benning… and time was tight as despite our wristbands, we’d been advised that if we got to Leicester Square late, we risked not being let into a pen due to a 4:30pm lockdown…

We got there at 4:35pm. Here’s how it went down:

The pen I’ve been put into is small, isolated, located behind a giant posing board that blocks about 80% of the view, and is populated with at least one shark (a metaphor, you understand. Sharks don’t exist on land).… at least the music was a heady mix of 1930s swing, German beer hall music, 1980s dance and other unidentifiable tunes.

The pen I’ve been put into is small, isolated, located behind a giant posing board that blocks about 80% of the view, and is populated with at least one shark (a metaphor, you understand. Sharks don’t exist on land).… at least the music was a heady mix of 1930s swing, German beer hall music, 1980s dance and other unidentifiable tunes.

“Sign something! Sign ANYTHING!” ”Why… is somebody here already??” ”NO… just running a drill…”

“Sign something! Sign ANYTHING!”
”Why… is somebody here already??”
”NO… just running a drill…”

“But none of these people look anything LIKE Scarlett Johansson…” ”That’s probably because she’s not coming” ”But why?????”  These questions, outside of a theorised answer of “better things to do”, will not be answered.

“But none of these people look anything LIKE Scarlett Johansson…”
”That’s probably because she’s not coming”
”But why?????”
These questions, outside of a theorised answer of “better things to do”, will not be answered.

iPhone cameras are starting to get kind of ridiculous now…

iPhone cameras are starting to get kind of ridiculous now…

“You know those treats you give me everytime smell something that’s suspicious? Well how do you know I’m not going to start planting suspicious things so you’ll give me those treats??” ”You’re such a cute doggie…” ”… and you can’t understand a word I say, can you?”

“You know those treats you give me everytime smell something that’s suspicious? Well how do you know I’m not going to start planting suspicious things so you’ll give me those treats??”
”You’re such a cute doggie…”
”… and you can’t understand a word I say, can you?”

My spot near dropoff means I’m one of the first to see cars when they arrive. To my tired eyes the number plate on this Mercedes appears to spell something like the word “BEER”, which is what I can’t wait to drink in the comfort of my apartment, possibly many hours from now if my train company Govia Does That Thing It Does.

My spot near dropoff means I’m one of the first to see cars when they arrive. To my tired eyes the number plate on this Mercedes appears to spell something like the word “BEER”, which is what I can’t wait to drink in the comfort of my apartment, possibly many hours from now if my train company Govia Does That Thing It Does.

“That’s Right!! I have arrived! Love me!!! Even though I don’t know who any of you are or what you want from me - LOVE ME!!!”  - young Archie Yates plays the role of ‘Yorki’ in the film.

“That’s Right!! I have arrived! Love me!!! Even though I don’t know who any of you are or what you want from me - LOVE ME!!!” - young Archie Yates plays the role of ‘Yorki’ in the film.

“I’m sorry about that brief interlude of over-enthusiasm. My demeanour of cynical detachment will resume”

“I’m sorry about that brief interlude of over-enthusiasm. My demeanour of cynical detachment will resume”

“I know all the kids are wearing their shirts tie-less, but I’m a kid and… well… as you see….”  Roman Griffin-Davis plays the titular “JoJo” in the film. I believe /speculate that the role of ‘Rabbit’ is still being kept under wraps, but I feel it might be Matt Damon. It makes sense if you think about it with beer.

“I know all the kids are wearing their shirts tie-less, but I’m a kid and… well… as you see….”
Roman Griffin-Davis plays the titular “JoJo” in the film. I believe /speculate that the role of ‘Rabbit’ is still being kept under wraps, but I feel it might be Matt Damon. It makes sense if you think about it with beer.

Roman Griffin-Davis poses with his two twin brothers… though the fact that none of them are putting bunny rabbits above each others’ heads when being photographed by the press just feels kind of… un-brotherly.

Roman Griffin-Davis poses with his two twin brothers… though the fact that none of them are putting bunny rabbits above each others’ heads when being photographed by the press just feels kind of… un-brotherly.

Somebody’s clearly playing the Bunny-Rabbit-Ears  Long Game .

Somebody’s clearly playing the Bunny-Rabbit-Ears Long Game.

“I want headphones just like them, and I almost want to insist that he hand them over… but they look like the ones that will drown out my demands and I’d have to shout and….. “  Taika Waititi is the director of this film - to date I’ve loved ‘Eagle vs Shark’ and ‘Hunt for the Wilderpeople’, liked ‘Boy’, was mixed on Thor Ragnarok until I started watching it in German… and couldn’t get more then five minutes into ‘What We Do In The Shadows’ without turning it off. Taika Waititi, I feel, remains unconcerned.

“I want headphones just like them, and I almost want to insist that he hand them over… but they look like the ones that will drown out my demands and I’d have to shout and….. “
Taika Waititi is the director of this film - to date I’ve loved ‘Eagle vs Shark’ and ‘Hunt for the Wilderpeople’, liked ‘Boy’, was mixed on Thor Ragnarok until I started watching it in German… and couldn’t get more then five minutes into ‘What We Do In The Shadows’ without turning it off. Taika Waititi, I feel, remains unconcerned.

“You know… the more I look at this tie the less I’m convinced it has the polka dots I wanted…”

“You know… the more I look at this tie the less I’m convinced it has the polka dots I wanted…”

“If that’s the best you can do, then it’s really the best you can do”  I’d observed that this man looks like a three-way cross between actor Robert De Niro, actor Danny De Vito, and Australian director George Miller. Sadly he was not identified on wireimage.

“If that’s the best you can do, then it’s really the best you can do”
I’d observed that this man looks like a three-way cross between actor Robert De Niro, actor Danny De Vito, and Australian director George Miller. Sadly he was not identified on wireimage.

“Shirt with no tie, obviously. Why… what did Archie tell you?”  Alfie Allen is best known for playing the role of Theon Greyjoy across most of Game of Thrones.

“Shirt with no tie, obviously. Why… what did Archie tell you?”
Alfie Allen is best known for playing the role of Theon Greyjoy across most of Game of Thrones.

<insert comment here>

<insert comment here>

“If I like, I’ll sign with the felt-tipped end… if I don’t, it’ll be with the cap end of the pen. And if I really don’t…. I haven’t decided yet”  - I last (attempted to) photograph(ed) Thomasin McKenzie a few days at    the premiere of ‘The King’    with the mighty Timothee Chalamet.

“If I like, I’ll sign with the felt-tipped end… if I don’t, it’ll be with the cap end of the pen. And if I really don’t…. I haven’t decided yet” - I last (attempted to) photograph(ed) Thomasin McKenzie a few days at the premiere of ‘The King’ with the mighty Timothee Chalamet.

“Some of you don’t look too threatening, I suppose…”

“Some of you don’t look too threatening, I suppose…”

“Funny how all those people just suddenly appeared between us. No idea how that happens…”  It seems pretty inevitable at most premieres, except I’m standing in the region where mere guests and ticketholders aren’t allowed, which makes this all the mysterious. By which I mean frustrating.

“Funny how all those people just suddenly appeared between us. No idea how that happens…”
It seems pretty inevitable at most premieres, except I’m standing in the region where mere guests and ticketholders aren’t allowed, which makes this all the mysterious. By which I mean frustrating.

“What am I currently working on? Oh, a screenplay. No… RIGHT NOW. I’m using this woman’s photo of me to write it. I’m going to distress her greatly by insisting she hand over this paper… but ultimately I think she won’t mind”

“What am I currently working on? Oh, a screenplay. No… RIGHT NOW. I’m using this woman’s photo of me to write it. I’m going to distress her greatly by insisting she hand over this paper… but ultimately I think she won’t mind”

“And what can I do for you? Just an autograph? REALLY? You mean I’ve travelled thousands of miles, crossed oceans, and the universe has put us together and the best way you can think of to commemorate this almost inconceivable meeting is for me to spread black ink of mine onto paper of yours? Actually… now that I’ve put it like that, it does sound kind of amazing. Let’s do it”

“And what can I do for you? Just an autograph? REALLY? You mean I’ve travelled thousands of miles, crossed oceans, and the universe has put us together and the best way you can think of to commemorate this almost inconceivable meeting is for me to spread black ink of mine onto paper of yours? Actually… now that I’ve put it like that, it does sound kind of amazing. Let’s do it”

So… that was that, really. Security actually asked if we wanted to leave the pen (or advised us that if we wanted to, we could) - and despite the photos being okay, it was very frustrating taking them so I decided to take them up on their offer.

More premiere(s) tomorrow… I think I might just restrict myself to one.

Until (next) Then!

ps. if you ever want to know when I post one of these journals (it’s less frequent at other times of the year) feel free to follow me on facebook or twitter, or Instagram (at premieresdotco)…. and feel free to peruse the Archive of Premieres, commission me to photograph your movie production, or just buy me a beer.